Brett is an actor living in Los Angeles. I’ve known him since high school and we were even roommates for a year, or so. In general, if you’re looking for dirt on me, Brett has it. All of it.

When I was learning to drive, on the farm, around age 13, I accidentally ran over the back legs of a young, slightly domesticated raccoon. I watched in horror as it pulled itself across the ground with two broken hind legs, but I was forced to drive off because my family was in urgent need of help. I still feel terrible for that.

One day, before I moved away from San Francisco, my roommates and I found out we had a raccoon that would come up the fire escape and sneak into our rooms. It ate my roommate Neil’s 23rd birthday chocolates. That made me laugh. It didn’t feel right, though. I decided that, before I left, I had to do something, so I ran over Neil’s legs and watched as he pulled himself across the ground back to the apartment.

Now I can be forgiven.


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