Dirty Hotel Room: Window

To continue yesterday’s theme, I managed to dig up this old video that I shot.

I checked into this hotel, went up to my room, and threw open the curtains to find…

(Total Running Time: 30 seconds)

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Dirty Hotel Room: Toilet

I stay in a lot of hotel rooms. And I know they don’t get cleaned thoroughly, but, somehow, I’m still surprised at the places where filth shows up.

At first things seem okay…

And, THEN, out… of… NOWHERE…

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FACTUAL ASSUMPTION: BANANA REPUBLIC

I occasionally shop at the Banana Republic.

Do you know the history of that store? It’s fascinating:

A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away…. The Banana Republic was controlled by the Senate, which, for security purposes, relinquished power to one man, thus, creating the Banana Empire. Over the next few years, the chain spread into shopping malls and took over stores like Gap and Old Navy. And, uh, you know, it’s really a complicated story. But, eventually, in an epic battle at the food court, a small group of rebels laid siege on a hot dog stand called the Death Stick. It was there they defeated the Banana Emperor and his minion, Darth Sweater, thus, returning order to the Banana Republic and general peace to shopping malls everywhere.

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Denver: The Icy Hell

This place did not look like this yesterday.

Denver gets a lot of snow, in general, but it snowed so much last night that even the Denver residents are pissed.

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In case you missed it…

This story from USA Today was just too good to be ignored.

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GUEST BLOGGER: NICK OLIVERO

Nick is a director/actor/writer/producer and artistic director of Boxcar Theatre in San Francisco. He let’s me sleep on his couch whenever I want. Strangely, the fact that Nick and I know each other, at all, is sheer coincidence.

It’s unusually warm in San Francisco right now. Or maybe it’s just because I’m fat. Regardless, it’s ‘no pants time’ for Nicky. Nothing better than letting it all hang out.

When the economy says fuck you, I say ‘fuck you’ to the economy. Boxcar Theatre, my delightful small company (Give a donation? Yeah thought not) is producing 11 full-length shows this year. Insane. In about a week and a half we open our third show in a season which started mid-September. “Museum” features 38 performers and is performed in actual museums and galleries throughout the Bay Area. We open at the Wax Museum in Fisherman’s Wharf. My favorite part is that the area in which we are performing, they have to move something like 20 statues – the divas: Marilyn Monroe, Reese Witherspoon, Madonna, Beyonce, and I’m gonna let you finish. I’m just happy that it’s the thin Oprah they are having to wheel out.

Speaking of Beyonce, too dated? I’ll proceed. Got an email forward with other Kanye interruptions the day after the awards. The best: Yo Bin Laden I’m ma let you finish, but Anne Frank was the best at Hide and Seek of all time!

The choice between pie and cake tells a lot about a person, so does the way you hang the roll of toilet paper on the spindle. I prefer the from behind technique, gives me more leverage for the tear, and I like pie. Cream pies to be exact. Which brings me back to why my fat ass is sitting in the office without pants on.

But the breeze is fabulous.

-Nick

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Marquee Pics – Louisville

Hey, Gang.

You know, not every comedy club has a cool marquee where they can put your name up in lights. But, this past weekend, the Improv in Louisville, KY, did. So, I thought I’d share:

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BIG NEWS: THREE QUICK THINGS

First off, watch me on CHELSEA LATELY tonight on E! Entertainment Television. It’s on at 8PM PST. I don’t know when it’s on in other places. And I don’t know the channel for E! in your area, so… You do have to take some responsibility on this one.

Second, look at this new website. Pretty fancy, huh? I’m going to be posting new content frequently. New videos, new blogs, new everything. So, keep checking back.

And number three: Come watch me tape my own half-hour special for Comedy Central. We’ll be taping in New York on November 5th. For tickets and more info, go here:

http://www.ocatv.com/shows/show/26/event/6501

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REMEMBER THE FALLEN

Army Spc. Gary “Cream-o” Wheat 31, of Appleton, Wis; assigned to the Special Troops Battalion, N.E.S.T., Fort Dix, NJ; died Oct 20 in Shanghai, China, while in pursuit of a Decepticon called Sideways. Sideways was killed instantly when cut in half by Sideswipe, an Autobot, and the ensuing debris rained down upon the surrounding area where Specialist Wheat was physically crushed by an oversized camshaft.

Return to Honor the Fallen main page

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FACTUAL ASSUMPTION: GORE VIDAL

Author Gore Vidal is a co-owner of Vidal Sassoon hair salons.

He teamed up with another author, Siegfried Sassoon, and they got into the styling racket. Originally, they were going to call themselves “Siegfried and Gore,” but, there was some confrontation with the Las Vegas lion tamers, Siegfried and Roy. So, Gore, as an act of good will toward his childhood friend, Roy, came up with Vidal Sassoon. Roy has yet to repay the favor.

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